Dancing days

 Now I've hit a certain age
My dancing days are through
My back it went a while ago
my knees are hurting too
Unbalanced is my body now
My grooving is bygone 
And even when the music stops
my arm flab still raves on 

I try in vain to jiggle
but my boobs like to explore 
Even with a fitted bra
They tend to touch the floor
It really can be shocking
I have to keep my wits
There is really nothing worse
if someone stands upon your tits

It is safer now for everyone
I'm banned from public raves
for all my bouncy flesh
Did seem to misbehave
I strapped them down with duct tape
Tucked them deep within my shirt
Unfortunately, they all got free
And several folks were hurt

The days of raving over
In the nightclubs way back then
An ASBO around the age
of forty minus ten
Though I still hear my favourite tunes
On the music box
Prodigy and underworld 
Now played by Sara Cox